It Shook Me Alright

Oh no, no, no…

Celine Dion sings AC/DC? WTF? And who is the tranny she is duetting with? Did Ellen condone this performance? So many questions, I am afraid it would be better to just forget we ever saw this travesty.

Click here if you need to cleanse your palette with the real thing.

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Pre-Emptive Feel Good Friday

Tomorrow is that most venerable American holiday, Independence Day. To celebrate, I present you with a “spectacular” tribute to both America and Neil Diamond.

So go out and join the 40 million other Americans paying $4 per gallon to inch along the freeways (or more, if you’re a lucky Southern Californian!), and grill a hot dog in the name of freedom. Don’t worry, cholesterol consumed on Federal Holidays doesn’t count!

Happy 4th of July everyone!

fireworks

The Day the Earth Stood Still Trailer!

Under normal circumstances, I would probably not be excited about this Day-After-Tomorrow-meets-Independence-Day-esque remake of the 1951 sci-fi film that I never saw. However, the movie stars Keanu Reeves as an alien who may or may not be trying to save the planet. Consider my ticket purchased.

“If the Earth dies, you die. If you die, the earth survives.” Say it with me now: Whoa!

Dimitri the Lover

Let the romance begin!

If Dimitri is indeed one of the few men in the city that has “nothing wrong with him” then I am formally proposing that we wall in Toronto and let the alpha males kill each other off. Olga, if you’re “psychologically normal,” you’ll take this guy’s advice and erase his number.

By the way, this guy Dimitri runs something called “Real Men,” which (as far as I can tell) is some sort of seminar on how to pick up women. I weep for Canadian women everywhere.

Feel Good Friday: Carbo-load edition

Anyone that knows me is aware that I have an active love affair with carbohydrates. If loving bread is wrong, I don’t want to be right. And now, finally, there is someone that shares my love, and indeed takes it to the next level. You can love your bread, just don’t luuuuuv your bread.

Sexy Fail

Speaking of failblog.org (aka “how I spent my entire Thursday afternoon”), this is priceless. Slightly NSFW, but all the important bits are pixelated.

Mmm, tasty!

From the hilarious failblog.org:

Is anyone else really craving a meat pie right now? God that’s good!