So Wrong and Sorry

Dear Nicole,
I owe you an apology. About a month ago, I posted an item saying you had your gastric bypass reversed, and would likely be gaining copious amounts of fast food induced weight. Well, according to your booking sheet, you are hanging in there at 85 lbs. Boy is my face red. Well done, Nicole. Well done.
Oh, but just so you know, you don’t have to go to these drastic measures to put me in my place. A phone call will suffice. You know how to reach me.
Also, I was talking to someone the other day, and he said that he thought you would be the first to die, beating out Paris, Britney, and Lindsay. Now let’s try to prove him wrong, shall we? Thanks gf.
— Megan

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