MadMegan.net

The Joker strikes again! The official Dark Knight site has been vandalized this morning, continuing the brilliant viral campaign that has been piquing interest in the Dark Knight for months now. Check out the site, and be mightily impressed by the Joker’s handiwork. Then pre-order your tickets — the movie comes out in one week!

Some might think it a bit tasteless to be forecasting the death of a well-beloved comedian. I, however, jumped that shark years ago, with Phil Hartman… and Chris Farley. So no harm in going for the trifecta, right?

Apparently Don Rickles just canceled all his Vegas show dates. It’s not that I am hoping he dies, it’s just that if/when he does, I want to be able to say I told you so. So, someone start the countdown clock. I give him six months, starting… NOW!

Oh no, no, no…

Celine Dion sings AC/DC? WTF? And who is the tranny she is duetting with? Did Ellen condone this performance? So many questions, I am afraid it would be better to just forget we ever saw this travesty.

Click here if you need to cleanse your palette with the real thing.

Tomorrow is that most venerable American holiday, Independence Day. To celebrate, I present you with a “spectacular” tribute to both America and Neil Diamond.

So go out and join the 40 million other Americans paying $4 per gallon to inch along the freeways (or more, if you’re a lucky Southern Californian!), and grill a hot dog in the name of freedom. Don’t worry, cholesterol consumed on Federal Holidays doesn’t count!

Happy 4th of July everyone!

Under normal circumstances, I would probably not be excited about this Day-After-Tomorrow-meets-Independence-Day-esque remake of the 1951 sci-fi film that I never saw. However, the movie stars Keanu Reeves as an alien who may or may not be trying to save the planet. Consider my ticket purchased.

“If the Earth dies, you die. If you die, the earth survives.” Say it with me now: Whoa!

Let the romance begin!

If Dimitri is indeed one of the few men in the city that has “nothing wrong with him” then I am formally proposing that we wall in Toronto and let the alpha males kill each other off. Olga, if you’re “psychologically normal,” you’ll take this guy’s advice and erase his number.

By the way, this guy Dimitri runs something called “Real Men,” which (as far as I can tell) is some sort of seminar on how to pick up women. I weep for Canadian women everywhere.

Anyone that knows me is aware that I have an active love affair with carbohydrates. If loving bread is wrong, I don’t want to be right. And now, finally, there is someone that shares my love, and indeed takes it to the next level. You can love your bread, just don’t luuuuuv your bread.

Speaking of failblog.org (aka “how I spent my entire Thursday afternoon”), this is priceless. Slightly NSFW, but all the important bits are pixelated.

From the hilarious failblog.org:

Is anyone else really craving a meat pie right now? God that’s good!

The comedian/actor George Carlin has died of heart failure, at the age of 71. Bogus.

Of course, most people remember him for his notorious “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television,” but in my mind he will always be “Rufus,” the kindly future dude who helped two lovable airheads pass history class, thus setting them up to rule the world.

RIP Rufus. Rock in Peace.